this week i have been

--rejected.
--disappointed.
--worried.
--scared.
--lost.
--humiliated.
--forgotten.
--tired.
--weary.

"In peace I will both lie down and sleep,
For You alone, Lord, make me to dwell in safety."
Psalm 4:8

what kind of person attracts you.

well, i have to start with the first look. because that's what everyone starts with. like scott judkins said so long ago, every relationship starts on level one--the first glance.
on first glance i notice hair, smile, and shoes. you're normally in a good place if you're wearing vans, converses, toms, or keds. smile is clean, genuine, innocent. hair is long, dark, scene-ish. i normally go for skaters and scene kids. but that's my knee-jerk. i normally am not attracted to these people beyond the shallow, worldly impressions.
when i get to know people, I'm attracted to Jesus. you normally don't get points if I have a real conversation with you and you don't glorify God or point back to Him. if i ask you about a decision, you better be praying about it. if i ask you why you did something, it better be because He said so. that's pretty much the bottom line. if you are not living by His Word, with His compassion and a true love for Him, you don't get points from me.

someone who fascinates you and why.

(if you didn't notice, i'm skipping certain days of this thirty-day thing that i don't really care about. i think that's cheating, but oh well.)

well, everyone interests me. i could really spend all day watching people if it weren't a little creepy and frowned upon in society. there are certain faces that i've been watching recently. a lot of them are guys--the male kingdom is just an enigma to me. none of them make sense. but if you're a subject of my staring, i'm not checking you out, promise--i'm just wondering who you are and why.
i wish i could know everyone's story. why they act the way they do. what do they believe. what drives them. what ticks them off.
someone specific who has been fascinating me recently is a kid named patrick. i've talked to him a few times--he's a really nice kid. i'm fascinated because i can see a love for Jesus in his face, but i'm not sure if i'm willing it to be there or not. i keep praying God would put him in my path so i can get to know him more.
i'm really weird. :P

updates on my life.

because i want to get all the stupid stuff out of my head now.
--i get to be the photographer for chelsea's weddinggggg! i'm so excited. i'm really praying that God will bless me with fantastic talents, at least for that one day.
--why is crocheting so hard?!
--i really need to shower, but i'm too lazy to. i'll shower in the morning.
--i'm a hipster lion for halloween. i'm pretty freakin proud of it.
--i hate the ways in which the world tells me i need to be fulfilled. it fills my brain with crap and i long for it and then i realize, i hate this.
--i really don't get along with people very well.
--i really want to go home, but at the same time that's the most dreadful idea in the world right now.
--a guy called me his dream woman yesterday. i didn't know him, but it was flattering c: and very funny.
--i still have homework to do. it's weird because i haven't really had actual homework all semester. i'm going to be screwed when i start having real classes.
--i want my longboard nowwwww.

the blanket i'm crocheting

that might be finished by the time i graduate.

5 celebrity guys you find attractive

i'm really going to prove my girliness on this one.
okay so here goes.
1. leonardo di caprio, BUT only in Titanic. he was beautiful. just look at that face. and he was so cheesy about Rose. just plain adorable.

2. heath ledger, BUT once again only in 10 Things I Hate About You. he got ugly as he got older. and then he did gay movies. which is just bad.

3. Logan Lerman from Percy Jackson. this one is pretty embarrassing, but honestly, he was pretty.

 4. mr. darcy! duh.



5. this last one was kind of difficult, because honestly i don't swoon over guys very much. but sylvia suggested this one, so i'll go with it.

christian bale! i forgot he was in little women. he totally should have married Jo.

on a roll.