thoughts on my life recently.

--i'm always afraid there's something terribly, terribly wrong with me. something within me has broken.
--i don't know what gets into me sometimes. i'm sorry.
--i'm finally memorizing psalm 139. i should have a long time ago, but that's the hardest chapter in the Bible for me to believe and live out.
--i haven't taken pictures in over a month.
--i enjoy off-roading very, very much. i don't really understand why, but it's such a release. one of these days i'm going to have a jeep.
--i over-corrected and downloaded every single podcast from Mclean Bible, Frontline, and Campus Church 2008. iTunes is still working on the eight hundred plus podcasts.
--i'm praying about adoption. it's a very long way off for me, but that possibility has never been so appealing to me as it seems to be now.
--i hate that, at times, i allow Satan to pull me down. i hate it.
--Psalm 139:2 says that He understands my thoughts from afar off. I'm really, really glad someone does.
--domino's breadbowl pasta dishes are fantastic, and disgustingly filling.
--Heaven Song by Phil Wickham. marvelous.
--i want to record worship songs.
--have you seen these toilets?! they're ginormous!
--TUMBLR'S NOT WORKING.
--i miss my longboard. soon, we shall be reunited.
--i wish i wasn't too stupid to realize and live what God has been trying to pound into me for years and years. He is the only friend that lasts, loves always, and provides me with the companionship I have labored to find on this Earth. I know that as soon as I rest in this fact, He will give me the friendship I need. Until I do, why do i deserve anything? I don't. He likes to make that clear.
--i had a massive, massive mental breakdown this morning. i've never experienced something like that. honestly, i felt possessed.
--i wonder if mello yello was once made with marijuana, so as to actually make one mellow...
--i need to see the stars.
--it's one thing to be accepted for who you are as a person. it's an entirely different thing when everything about a person motivates you to be better. you motivate me to be better.