Day Twenty-Seven::September Second, Two Thousand and Nine.

TWENTY-ONE REASONS LACEY DOESN'T HAVE A BOYFRIEND.
1. Nose flare.
2. Hip pop.
3. Steals Bagel Bites.
4. Sexy-eye fails.
5. Eats like an aardvark.
6. Slurps.
7. Puts finger up noses that don't belong to her.
8. Has love-at-first-sight with food.
9. Giggles.
10. Bites people/herself.
11. Was in an open relationship with a GIRL.
12. Abuses/shanks/stabs innocent food.
13. Her fingers are ninjas.
14. Says poo-poo.
15. Has an invincible nose.
16. Makes weird esophagus noises.
17. Has zits on her hands.
18. SHE'S SCARY.
19. Makes small children cry.
20. Fails at burping.
21. Is in love with a plastic knife.
22. SHE'S MY BEST FRIEND AND YOU CAN'T HAVE HER.